Tory Puns
Here is a page of funny, cute or clever puns about the Tories. Aiming to be original and humorous with some fun illustrations too.
I guess this page is more likely to be accessed by people of a left wing persuasion in order to laugh at the Tories.
That's fine, but let me assure you, as a professional punster these are delivered without a political bias.
Apart from hating the Tories of course.
But to be honest, I hate most politicians. There are a few decent ones. Not many.
Anyhow, here's some Tory puns.
I guess this page is more likely to be accessed by people of a left wing persuasion in order to laugh at the Tories.
That's fine, but let me assure you, as a professional punster these are delivered without a political bias.
Apart from hating the Tories of course.
But to be honest, I hate most politicians. There are a few decent ones. Not many.
Anyhow, here's some Tory puns.
Puns
bull fighting Tories - toryadors
cheap holiday - Torymolinos
dancing Tory - gyratory
how to make a little extra - cash for questions
leave your Rolls Royce in a multi-tory car park
make use of a Tory member - suppository
party discipline is a problem for Tories - they like the whip a little too much
poor driving skills - no left turns
rubbish football team - everyone is on the right wing
the day Tories pretend to care about the voters - Election day
Tory superhero - Con Man
trickle-down theory supported by incontinent Tories
useful Tory - lavatory
what do you call a criminal Tory? - Lord or Sir
where Tories concoct their manifesto - laboratory
cheap holiday - Torymolinos
dancing Tory - gyratory
how to make a little extra - cash for questions
leave your Rolls Royce in a multi-tory car park
make use of a Tory member - suppository
party discipline is a problem for Tories - they like the whip a little too much
poor driving skills - no left turns
rubbish football team - everyone is on the right wing
the day Tories pretend to care about the voters - Election day
Tory superhero - Con Man
trickle-down theory supported by incontinent Tories
useful Tory - lavatory
what do you call a criminal Tory? - Lord or Sir
where Tories concoct their manifesto - laboratory
Expressions
bribe goes before a fall - if you get caught that is
where there's muck there's Tories - snouts in troughs usually
where there's muck there's Tories - snouts in troughs usually
Famous Tories
Jonathan Aitken - priest, convicted criminal
Tori Amos - singer
Jeffrey Archer - novelist, convicted criminal
Helen of Tory - launched ships with her face, Anne Widdecombe?
Tori Amos - singer
Jeffrey Archer - novelist, convicted criminal
Helen of Tory - launched ships with her face, Anne Widdecombe?
Film and TV
Cash Me If You Can - entertaining thriller about a criminal swindler
Con Club - what happens in Con Club stays in, etc.
Love Tory - love turns to tragedy, just like the real thing
Con Club - what happens in Con Club stays in, etc.
Love Tory - love turns to tragedy, just like the real thing
Jokes
What do you call a Tory with an IQ of 75?
Minister
What do you call a Tory with an IQ of 50?
Prime Minister
How can you tell when a Tory is lying?
When his mouth is open
Minister
What do you call a Tory with an IQ of 50?
Prime Minister
How can you tell when a Tory is lying?
When his mouth is open
Social Media for Tories
ClinkedIn - networking for disgraced ex-ministers
eBlue - for recycled policies
FaceCrook - facetime your favorite Tory crooks
Instagrant - take photos of holidays paid for from taxpayer funds
Nobflix - for posh films
OnlyTories - top politicians get their kit off
Predditor - like Reddit but for bent Tories
Wickedpedia - check history of Tory wrongdoings
eBlue - for recycled policies
FaceCrook - facetime your favorite Tory crooks
Instagrant - take photos of holidays paid for from taxpayer funds
Nobflix - for posh films
OnlyTories - top politicians get their kit off
Predditor - like Reddit but for bent Tories
Wickedpedia - check history of Tory wrongdoings
Songs for Tories
Words for Making Tory Puns
Here are some handy words for making puns about the Tory party.
conservative, manifesto, politics, right, right wing, tories, tory, true-blue
conservative, manifesto, politics, right, right wing, tories, tory, true-blue
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Parliament is now closed so we can all take ten weeks holiday, paid for by the taxpayer, the arms industry or pharmaceutical companies.
See you in the next session!
Parliament is now closed so we can all take ten weeks holiday, paid for by the taxpayer, the arms industry or pharmaceutical companies.
See you in the next session!