Time Puns for a Wind Up
A page of Time Puns, jokes and anything humorous to do with time, including horology, maybe even a little time-travel.
It is of course well past time this page was created.
A just in time delivery, built in a timely fashion with no time to waste.
Without a minute to spare and all hands on deck, a metronome keeping the beat of fingers tapping on keyboard, and the sands of time measuring progress - this writer has endeavored to bring you a humorous journey through time puns.
It is of course well past time this page was created.
A just in time delivery, built in a timely fashion with no time to waste.
Without a minute to spare and all hands on deck, a metronome keeping the beat of fingers tapping on keyboard, and the sands of time measuring progress - this writer has endeavored to bring you a humorous journey through time puns.
OK, you get the idea. A set of puns, maybe the odd joke, a little content (nothing too taxing) and a picture.
Chances are you can skip through it in under a minute and go back to clock watching until the lunchtime break.
Obviously it takes considerably longer than a minute to create a decent Time Pun page so expect a few gaps until more time has passed.
Set the sundial for a suitable period and let's check out the puns.
Chances are you can skip through it in under a minute and go back to clock watching until the lunchtime break.
Obviously it takes considerably longer than a minute to create a decent Time Pun page so expect a few gaps until more time has passed.
Set the sundial for a suitable period and let's check out the puns.
Puns
analyze a horologist and find out what makes him tick
bedside clock panicked - it was an alarmed clock
bet on a horse at five to one, it came in at half past four
buy old clocks from second-hand shops
clock with no hands - timeless
curvy horologist with an hourglass figure
deep sea clocktopus has lots of hands
dental appointment at two-thirty (tooth-hurty)
dog with one eye on the clock - watchdog
don't want a stopwatch, I want one that works
eating a clock was time-consuming
he was so slow you could use a calendar as a stopwatch
make time for horology
jailed horologist was serving time
no one's stealing clock puns from here, not on my watch
time-pressed religion - Hurry Krishna
time-travelling reptile - clockodile
timely bird - clockatoo
throw alarm clock out the window and watch time fly
want to grow herbs but don't have the thyme
watches hate humans, we keep winding them up
watch-maker never forgets a watch-face
bedside clock panicked - it was an alarmed clock
bet on a horse at five to one, it came in at half past four
buy old clocks from second-hand shops
clock with no hands - timeless
curvy horologist with an hourglass figure
deep sea clocktopus has lots of hands
dental appointment at two-thirty (tooth-hurty)
dog with one eye on the clock - watchdog
don't want a stopwatch, I want one that works
eating a clock was time-consuming
he was so slow you could use a calendar as a stopwatch
make time for horology
jailed horologist was serving time
no one's stealing clock puns from here, not on my watch
time-pressed religion - Hurry Krishna
time-travelling reptile - clockodile
timely bird - clockatoo
throw alarm clock out the window and watch time fly
want to grow herbs but don't have the thyme
watches hate humans, we keep winding them up
watch-maker never forgets a watch-face
Expressions
A stitch in time saves nine - avoid procrastination
Even a stopped clock is right twice a day
Second to none - the best
Time is like a river - it flows and is never coming back
Time is money - make the most of it
Time waits for no man - but is flexible for women
Times up - end of something
Even a stopped clock is right twice a day
Second to none - the best
Time is like a river - it flows and is never coming back
Time is money - make the most of it
Time waits for no man - but is flexible for women
Times up - end of something
Films
Back To The Future - the space time continuum
Clockwise - John Cleese headmaster races against time
Endless - intriguing horror film leaving as many questions as answers
Groundhog Day - repeat the same day until you finally get it right
Predestination - the snake that eats itself - absorbing film about time travel and more
Terminator - the future has not been written
Clockwise - John Cleese headmaster races against time
Endless - intriguing horror film leaving as many questions as answers
Groundhog Day - repeat the same day until you finally get it right
Predestination - the snake that eats itself - absorbing film about time travel and more
Terminator - the future has not been written
Horology Corner
Horology is the study and repair of timepieces, the older the better. It is a fascinating, absorbing and satisfying hobby which can also be a profession.
The timepieces are wonders of tiny engineering. With many small moving parts they will eventually require some maintenance to prolong their lives.
That is where the horologist comes in.
The timepieces are wonders of tiny engineering. With many small moving parts they will eventually require some maintenance to prolong their lives.
That is where the horologist comes in.
Jokes
Don't ask a horologist to work in a bar. They are always calling time.
Two burglars in a jeweler's shop. "I'll take the first watch"
Clock jumped off the table and disappeared out the door. Need to retrieve it but times running out.
What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to get a new fence.
Two burglars in a jeweler's shop. "I'll take the first watch"
Clock jumped off the table and disappeared out the door. Need to retrieve it but times running out.
What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time to get a new fence.
Famous Timekeepers
Big Ben - famous London clock at the Palace of Westminster
Doctor Who - time-travelling doctor uses Tardis to travel through space and time
Father Time - old man who represents time
Doctor Who - time-travelling doctor uses Tardis to travel through space and time
Father Time - old man who represents time
Social Clocks
FaceTime - make time for acquaintances
NetFlux - for watching Back to the Future reruns
Strapchat - pictures of clocks
TickTock - time passes
NetFlux - for watching Back to the Future reruns
Strapchat - pictures of clocks
TickTock - time passes
Songs about Time
In The Midnight Hour - Wilson Pickett
Rock Around The Clock - Bill Haley and the Comets
Time - Pink Floyd
Rock Around The Clock - Bill Haley and the Comets
Time - Pink Floyd
Trivia
The Doomsday Clock was something that used to worry me. I guess that was the point of it. It is a measure of how close they think humanity is to its own destruction.
Seriously. Some people have too much time on their hands.
Seriously. Some people have too much time on their hands.
Words for Punning
Handy words for making puns about time.
age, alarm, calendar, clock, hands, horology, hourglass, metronome, minute, punctual, second, stopwatch, sundial, thyme, tick, time, tock, watch, wind, wound
age, alarm, calendar, clock, hands, horology, hourglass, metronome, minute, punctual, second, stopwatch, sundial, thyme, tick, time, tock, watch, wind, wound
Times Up
Looks like we ran out of time. It is a precious commodity so use it well.
Or waste it on the internet, it's your time after all.
Or waste it on the internet, it's your time after all.